therelevantrhino

By Reid Tim, The Limes of Tondon: Though much less senior than the Senator, John McCain’s senior advisers have drawn up plans for the Senator to shuffle loose the mortal coil should he accidentally wind up President on Nov. 4th. Sources close to the McCain campaign have stated, on conditions of anonymity, that on the off chance the Senator manages to steal the election through massive voter suppression and fraud, he will effectively die in office on Tues, Jan. 21st, 2009.

This will usher in the age of Palin, which will be viewed in black and white by the rest of the world…picutre the beginning of the Wizard of Oz, if it helps. One McCain surrogate, we’ll call her Pfancy Notenhauer, said, “We look forward to stealing this election, and taking the United States back. And by back, I mean to the 13th Century.”

Amid rumors of impending mortality, John McCain himself told the Limes of Tondon, “My friends, why the hell would I want to live in a world with Sarah Palin as the President. She’ll freakin’ kill us all.”

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