therelevantrhino

This will probably fly over the heads of some people who don’t believe that science has any place in our society, but I’m not here for you. I’m here for intelligent people that enjoy a decent conversation about serious topics. Last night, some 65 million homes were tuned into the first of (presumably) three Presidential debates. Regardless of how this is spun on either side, one thing people do pay attention to is body language. One of the most honorable things one can do is look someone in the eye. It’s a sign of confidence, cognizance, and capability. Indeed, it is also a sign of respect, and more importantly, a sign that you are not afraid of the person in front of you.

So, on to the monkey science. Primatologists, a fancy word for people that study monkey behavior for those of you who went to religious schools, have marked several similarities between human behavior and primate behavior. Given what we saw last night, we can make some conclusive observations regarding the body language of the two candidates.

Posture: Barack Obama stood up straight, which shows confidence. John McCain was hunched over his podium, frequently gripping the sides, which shows intimidation.

Eye contact/movement: this is one primatologist’s opinion on the debate last night:

“McCain was afraid of Obama. It was really clear–look at how much McCain blinked in the first half hour. I study monkey behavior–low ranking monkeys don’t look at high ranking monkeys. In a physical, instinctive sense, Obama owned McCain tonight and I think the instant polling reflects that.
So McCain may have given away his status as a low-ranking monkey. I’d never even considered monkey rank.”

If we think of this in terms of a socio-psychological perspective, lack of eye contact shows either contempt(which translates to fear), or a failure to recognize the legitimacy of the other person. To do so reveals an arrogance so profound, a conciet so far removed from reality, that we must immeaditely question the judgment and character of the man giving those signs.

“As a psychotherapist and someone who treats people with anger management problems, we typically try to educate people that anger is often an emotion that masks other emotions. I think it’s significant that McCain didn’t make much, if any, eye contact because it suggests one of two things to me; he doesn’t want to make eye contact because he is prone to losing control of his emotions if he deals directly with the other person, or, his anger masks fear and the eye contact may increase or substantiate the fear.”

And, of course, it wouldn’t one of my posts if I didn’t throw in a jab or two of my own. So, I watched the same debate as everyone else, and here’s what I saw. I saw a bitter, angry, callous man hunched troll-like over a podium (memories of Cheney came to mind) who was so afraid of losing his shit, he refused to acknowlege his opponent. His behavior was trite, cowardly, offensive, and rude, and he reminded me simultaneously of a school-yard bully and a crotchety old man.  He didn’t look like a president, he looked like George Bush.  Conpicuously missing from post-debate spin was Vice Presidential nominee Caribou Barbie, who was explicitly told by the campaign to refuse questions and make no statements.  Conversely, Joe Biden was on every major network with the exception of ABC,  who refused to give him face time in lieu of fairness to Mooseolini’s absence.

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